It's that time of the year

When we are bombarded with the message that if we don't buy enough shit to celebrate the birth of Jesus we are non-humans.

The worst of these messages come from the jewelry industry.

The third worst campaign is the annoying woman on the TV say "He went to Jared". Every time I hear that phrase I want to throw something at her. Oh I see so he went to Jared, therefore he is the greatest man ever. He didn't pay the mortgage, or put food on the table or put money away for his kid's college education. Nah, that's for suckers. Instead he spent thousands of dollars buy a trinket that has absolutely no purpose. Give the man a prize!

The second worst is "Every kiss begins with K (K as in Kay Jewelers). Interesting message there Kay. Your woman is really gold digging whore who will only give you kisses if you buy her shiny trinkets. Nice.

But the absolute worst is DeBeers. That monopoly that at one point controlled almost 100% of the world's diamonds. You know them by the "A Diamond is Forever" campaign. Sure it's forever, so is a styrofoam cup. You know what else lasts almost forever? The debt that you incur buying those diamonds on the 23% APR VISA.

No matter, you only have 23.75 days left until the end of the glorious shopping season. Get out and spend until you can spend no more. Remember, if you don't, Jesus, your wife and kids will hate you. And the terrorists will have won too.