Wednesday, August 27, 2008

I'm sorry!

After watching Hillary's speech last night, I realize that I owe everyone an apology. So here it is.

I'm sorry. Really, really, really sorry.

As a white, heterosexual male, not on welfare and not in need of government assistance for every day living, I now realize I am the scum of the earth. I sincerely and deeply apologize. For everything and everything from time immemorium. Thanks to Hillary's great vision of change and hope, I now realize that the true champions of the world are those that contribute the less as well as those that best play the victim game. So to all my non white, non-heterosexual, non-productive members of society with their extended firmly out waiting for the government dole to arrive, I salute you. And to all you white, heterosexual males out there getting your asses out of bed at 6:00 so you can go work all day long in order to pay 50% of your income to the government...go to hell you racist, sexist, ageist, homophobic, non-earth loving, SUV driving, gun owning assholes!

And I encourage each and every one of you to proudly take Mrs. Clinton's advice and vote for more. Vote for more race based employment practices. Vote for more welfare. Vote for more "gay" rights. Equal pay for women? Fuck that. I say a woman needs to be paid 150% of what a man makes. "Free" health care? Not on my watch you don't. Not only should you get 100% of your health coverage paid for, but if you are a non-white, non-heterosexual, non-productive member of society, you get money in your pocket each time you visit the doctor. Sound crazy? It's not any different than the tax rebate checks for those who pay no taxes.

And most of all if you are a single woman without health insurance, you should be encouraged to adopt as many children as you can. Why stop at 2 as the woman in Hillary's speech last night? I say every single mother should adopt a minimum of 5 children. After all what better environment for a child to grow up in than with a single mother living in squalor? In Hillary-Obama-Hope for Change-and-Change-for-hope world it makes sense. Those 5 kids will be Democrat voters for the rest of their lives as they get taught from early on that the only way to survive is via a government handout.


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